Pinterest is the Devil!!!

What would Pinterest do with this? Give me a minute and I’ll think of something……

Pinterest is the Devil!

Have you been sucked into the swirling vortex of this website of totally awesome recipes, fashion, books, photography, craft adventures, etc?  Are you scavenging back alleys and loading docks for shipping pallets to repurpose into a house full of furniture for next to nothing?  Did you print off the 40 Ways to Tie a Scarf and have it posted next to your dresser?  Or maybe you’ve stepped up your blah manicure with nails that look like peacock feathers? 

If you have managed to steer clear of this magical land, let me explain what it is.  At  www.pinterest.com  a wandering soul can join and suddenly this amazing world of ‘pinning’ opens up to them.  Your own personal file is available for you to save whatever frolics across your path and tickles your fancy.  Just one click, and it is saved for you to run back to and find where-oh-where on the Internet is the instructions to make, buy, visit, or simply enjoy that desire of  your heart. 

For the person with the self-control of a monk, this is a wonderful site.  Most projects are very cheap to do and saves you money.  It encourages repurposing items headed to the dump pile and opens new doors to getting those creative juices going.  Did I mention all the handy tips to make life a breeze?  No kidding.  It is the Holy Grail of Imagination and Creativity. 

But, then you have me.  I’m the gal, who when working 60+ a week with three little girls, decided she needed to take a wheat weaving class.  Cliff calmly questioned the announcement with: “Kelly, the first grade teacher sent a note home your daughter can’t see out her hair?  If you don’t have time to trim her bangs, when are you going to have time to weave wheat?”  Point taken, so all the wheat in Barber County has straight stalks thanks to Mr. Killjoy.  Then, when we were moving all the possessions of our six family members and two dogs across town at Christmas, while both of us were working full time and fitting in Christmas programs, Band concerts, and the company Christmas parties, I had the brilliant impulse to tan a deer hide.  Again, that deep voice asked kindly, “Why?” 

Stuttering because I hadn’t really thought out the finished result, I stammered, “Because, I want to make moccasins???”   A deer hide was brought in and rotted in a trash can of some kind of goop while I proceeded to teeter on the edge of a nervous breakdown.   I’m the luckiest gal in the world because when we bought our house, I would say “I have an idea!”, and Cliff would immediately threaten to block HGTV.  But he never did.  

 That is love, my friend. 

 Isn’t there something about the freshness of a new project, a clean slate, an unmarked canvas.  There may be mountains of half-finished projects scattered around, but a new one……ahhh!

When my mono-stricken daughter introduced me to the site in November, I knew to ‘just say no!” I knew me too well.  After Christmas, I pinned a little, but held fast to my resolve.

Until about a month ago.  We were on a long vacation weekend with some free time on my hands.  Life had been a little crazy, so I told myself, “You are on vacation. Why not?  You deserve to go there—for just a taste.”  (Yes, I would have caved to the White Witch in Narnia. No doubt about it. )

Three hours of time escaped somewhere, because I could verify it was only 15 minutes.  I’d pinned about 4000 new ideas, and my blood pressure was pinging off the ceiling from the excitement of trying things I didn’t know existed a few hours prior.  The minute I got home I was painting rocks with a fun font to identify herbs in my garden (very cute) and up for whipping up a new squash casserole (wonderful).  Success!  Since I could not afford to miss a thing, I was up way too late scouring for more ideas.  Before long I was stirring up natural weed-killer (works), setting up a fairy garden which we do not have evidence any tiny winged people or gnomes having staying there yet, and debating if I should jump on my periodic roller coaster of should my hair be long or short with the cute style pics

My brakes suddenly wore out due to screeching to a stop for random garage sales. And auctions!  The Mother Lode for tons of great stuff for my good intentions-who knows if they’ll ever be actually used?

My guys gave me ‘the look’.  You know the one you’d get if you announced that the package from the mailbox is supplies to make mozzarella cheese.  (Kind of interesting process—debating if it will become a life skill I will delve in regularly.)  But, stuff like this makes me think I can do anything.  Some of the fascination is in the challenge.

They, also, pointed out Pinterest had invaded my conversations.  “Oh, I saw where if you spray your pepper with Epson salts mixed with water, they will produce more.”   “Did you know if you spray a wine bottle white and glue Epson salts to it, it looks all glittery and very chic?”  Suddenly, I can tempt  future employers when they see ‘Epson Salt Expert’ on my resume’.  

Last week I got to share some Pinterest delights since the theme was about night and being in the dark.  A glowing xylophone was a hit. Writing on ourselves with a highlighter in the black light suddenly turned the Lincoln Library into Miss Kelly’s tattoo parlor.  But the glittering “Fairies in a Jar” project?  Epic fail.  Once again, let down by the Tooth Fairy and her friend swarm.  

I find myself clearing my name to friends who are other Pinterest pinners and saying, “Really, I don’t live on there all the time. They nod sympathy because they know.  They’ve seen my name on there every day and the black circles under my eyes from my wee hour Pinterest meetings.  It’s evident I can think of nothing else and prayed to be checked into a PA (Pinners Anonymous) Rehab. 

Then my intervention pinned me to reality.

Not meaning to lead anyone astray, my new sister-in-law was wringing her hands with what to do about her overly abundant produce from a garden quite possibly to be featured on “The Victory Garden” next month. (I don’t know what she’s doing, but she’d put Martha Stewart’s garden in the dust.  That’s dangerous ground  if you outdo the Queen.  After the prison stint, I’m sure she knows people, if you get what I mean.)  But I jump to help  “Why, you can make salsa, and pickles, and relish, and taco sauce, and…..” I encourage her.  I have recipes I can send you.”

“I don’t want to can.  Ever,” she says blandly.  I gasp.

 But, in no time she has caved.  She’s so excited and chopping peppers like a Ginsu commercial and racking up a storehouse like she’s living on Walton’s Mountain. 

She says to me, “You’re my own personal Pinterest!”  Eeeekkkkkk!  What have I done?  I have dragged someone down the checkered path with me. 

Saddest to me when God has given me the gift of time, the partially finished project of my dreams hasn’t moved as quickly.  Who has time when you are learning to make the perfect tortilla?   Or maybe it’s an excuse to put off the project, because the next steps you have no idea how to do them?  And that’s a scary world.   But, there is no doubt it’s one I’m supposed to step into. 

Here’s the deal.  There is nothing wrong at all with Pinterest.  It’s an awesome site.  I am the Compulsion Queen, who cages up Self-Control in a cool chicken coop made out of wooden cable spools (looks too cool and easy to make) and then forgets to feed it , let alone releasing it to run and scratch out the grubs and worms in my life. Exactly like my husband’s deep voice, I need to stop, listen, and take into account what I am giving up by getting distracted and consumed.   Consumed to the point offering to deliver my new grandbaby as a nice little shower gift, (Kind of hurt my feeling when they declined) or looking for DIY instructions on “How to Install a Pacemaker Using a Couple of  Wire Twisty Ties and a Timex.” 

Hmmm…don’t think those things are God’s purpose for me.  And would be about as successful as keeping fairies in a jar.

The end of all things is near.  Therefore, be clear minded and self-controlled so that you can pray.  1 Peter 4:7

photo credit: walt from masterpieceintheworks.wordpress.com